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You Can’t Lie to Your Kids Anymore

01/10/2011

One of the cardinal joys of parenting is gone forever. No longer can children be told that storks are central to childbirth, or that Santa Claus is real, or that needles are painless. Any kid who knows how to Google–and chances are, they can do it way better than you can–is able to fact-check your bullshit and expose you for a fraud.

This includes claiming to be a champion of virtue whose behaviour serves as a model for humanity. You can’t pretend you skipped your youth anymore. At least, not if your youth happened while online social networking did. The photographic evidence of your debauchery is online now, and it’s never going away. I don’t care what your privacy settings are. Your eight-year-old will circumvent them in a matter of minutes.

Wikileaks yanked down America’s pants, but Facebook will do for yours.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Kimberley Walsh permalink
    01/10/2011 8:41 PM

    You seem bitter. Did you find out this year that Santa wasn’t real? I wonder if you could block your kid from searching for articles pertaining to Santa (and obviously downloading porn) with Parental Monitoring Software? I’m gonna go do some research.

  2. 01/11/2011 9:24 AM

    What, you don’t come here for unbridled cynicism?

    • Kimberley Walsh permalink
      01/11/2011 3:17 PM

      Oh I do, I enjoy it served up with a side of Sarcasm and a dash of irony.

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